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This from Dark Hearts by Loren Pedersen.

“The patriarchal age has been a surprisingly short period compared to the matriarchal dominance lasting at least from some time during the last Ice Age up to the civilization of Crete. ”

My undergrad alma mater is Babson College. Their focus is entrepreneurial studies and/or how to become a CEO. I graduated in 1969 when the first woman student entered as a freshman. Now the majority of students are women.

What does it say about my feminine side that I cheer this? I see this as boding well for the future.

Is it the end of patriarchal age and the beginning of the next matriarchal age? If so, our future has been made brighter. My concern is that Pedersen refers to the Ice Age as our last one,  not as in no more, but as in their will be another.

How Do You React to Darkness?

Stand outside In your backyard on a night of a new moon.  Preferably a cloudy night too, No stars, pitch black, dark

If artificial light disturbs the darkness go to your basement.  Decide on which place is the darkest and stand there for a while taking in the blankness of its attributes.

How does it feel? Absorb the feeling. Is it one of peace or fear? What is it? Why is it? Which have you defaulted to?

Rites of Passage or Rights of Passage?

A man that I visited in a nursing home had incurred two broken hips since I had last seen him. He is in his late eighties and apparently facing his remaining life in a room.

There is little about him that is downbeat. He is engaged. Not showing any sign of depression. His demeanor provoked me to look for weakness. Is he crazy, narcissistic, or just a good guy?

I find it easier to find fault than I do in praising him. He has undergone a rite of passage that I don’t think I ever will. I have come and gone into puberty, adulthood, middle age and now early old without any signs of evidence that I ever experience a passage of any sorts.  Other than time passing. I feel the same as yesterday, today, and tomorrow.

What I see in him as some kind of psychotic disturbance might be me looking dimly in a mirror. How have I jumped from sixteen to sixty-six without recognition? This man has been in the military and worn several other uniforms, many with badges. Occupations I would have spurned in my younger hours. I wanted recognition but never thought of it doing it the way he did.

Life for me has been more a passing than an entry. Until New Hampshire, moving from one town to another. It is what I see as intriguing about Lee Child’s fictional character Reacher.

Rather than hold to his military exploits, Reacher seems to wander into new realms. Where others might be insecure, he lives one day at a time and becomes prominent as a go to guy, a guy we might ask about life’s meaning. He is a wandering monk. A monastery is his likely next stop, not a nursing home.

One man real, and the other imagination, which one would I rather be?

Amina

Writing a memoir, especially one that includes exploration of the dark side of everything, including God, is hard work. It makes me want to go to analysis because I have begun to see much I haven’t see before. Stuff I didn’t even know existed. Amina is one.

Loren Pedersen writes, “the more in touch with the inner feminine a man is, the more comfortable he is likely to be with inner self-exploration. The anima, as a potential connection to his unconscious, may appear personified in his dreams and fantasies.”

When I picked up his book Dark Hearts, one that was leant to me, I had little interest. That was at the beginning of August. I am now the proud owner of the book and reading it at the fast clip of about two pages a day. No meat here. Hah!

“He Had The Wrong Dreams.”

“All wrong.” Biff then added in Arthur Miller’s Death of a Salesman. “The man didn’t know who he was.”

I can identity. Can you?

My quest is to unearth my dark side and my angst is serving me.

Some mornings I feel like my walk is over and other mornings I am just beginning.

I need to be Harry and to have Hermine, characters in Hermann Hesse’s Steppenwolf.

Oh wait, I think my life’s partner was Hermine in an earlier life. Was I Harry?

 

 

Snoring Sully Sullenberger

In the AARP Bulletin, of which I am old enough to read, there is a conversation with Sully Sullenberger, the pilot who five years ago safely landed a jet on the Hudson River saving 155 passengers and crew.

Among his many experiences since, Sully was invited to Obama’s first inaugural ball. After being introduced to Obama, the President turned to Sully’s wife and said,”America considers him a hero.”

And Sully’s wife Lorrie said, “Well, the world may think him a hero, but he still snores!”

And that is what makes heroes real.

The Place In-between

James Hillman writes, “The place that analysis and theology have in common is the soul. But the soul is a ‘non-place’ for neither theology or dynamic psychotherapy regards it as its main concern. The one studies God and God’s intentions, the other studies men and women’s motivations, while the place in-between is too often left unoccupied.”

From Hillman’s book Insearch:psychology and religion.

In the Monadnock area of New Hampshire, we have group called Monadnock Area Psychotherapist Services (MAPS). They are a group of psychotherapists whose aim is to include in their therapy practice the place in-between.

How appealing is that to you? Do you feel an in-between place?