When is writing so personal it turns us off? In other words, what makes you and I connect to a piece of writing and at other times disconnect? Is the way we connect to writers any different than the way we connect in person?

When do we say that is more than we wanted to know? When is another’s experience helpful and at other times not? 

I have at least two roles in nursing homes,  chaplain and ombudsman. Where I am one I am not to be the other. The ombudsman role requires listening and solving and the chaplain’s  role requires listening. I hear more whining as an ombudsman than I do as a chaplain. 

I think this says much about how we react to one another. There is a time for solving and a time for listening. Which it is depends upon how we perceive our role and how we are perceived. Our role is often decided by another before we meet and it doesn’t always coincide with our own perception of it. 

5 thoughts on “Friendship

  1. Irene Waters 19 Writer Memoirist September 20, 2013 / 4:53 pm

    It is why we have friends that are so different to each other. With each we connect in a way which satisfies one small part of our whole but not in entirety – so we have many friends. Writing is the same. The same writer will hit a chord, satisfying one part of your being and at other times not.

    • fictionfitz September 21, 2013 / 7:54 am

      Irene, how true! I don’t know about you, but too often I wanted to mold my friends to be one way. It would be less confusing.
      Perhaps this is why it takes so long to become a writer. To allow life’s experiences to show us our we have little control over anything and that includes others. The ultimate epiphany for me was to realize diversity is a heck of a lot more interesting.

  2. Carole Webber September 20, 2013 / 5:13 pm

    Interesting comparison of your two nursing home roles. I guess that as an ombudsman it requires something of you to help solve the clients grievances. Not all complaints shoild be perceived as whining, some are justified and probably offer good suggestions for improving. I would not like to be considered a whiner, just ask me, I know!
    As a chaplain, again you listen but offer comfort. compassion and understanding, above all sharing prayerful moments..
    Reacting to each other is a personality thing, we do not all gel together. I think you find that out almost instantly but how you hide that takes a lot of finesse

    • fictionfitz September 21, 2013 / 7:50 am

      Carole, this is a terrific comment. Thank you. Chaplaincy and ombudsman requires discernment, but
      even as a member of the NAOW pronounced NOW! I find winers difficult. My friend John might say it is projection.
      By the way, in case you forgot the acronym of NAOW stands for the National Association of Winers. I am a
      card carrying member. I want it NOW! Used to be AAOW or A-OW! as that was our cry, but I think the revision
      to NAOW is more appropriate. We don’t want people to just hear our whines, but to act upon them, right now!

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